Billionaires Lose Big In Stock Crash - oh, boo-fucking-hoo

Billionaires Lose Big In Stock Crash

Oh, boo-fucking-hoo.

"Rich company founders and shareholders benefited from the market's rally to record highs in September, but its free fall this week has shaved billions from their fortunes, showing just how exposed today's rich have become to wild market swings."

Let's dissect this:

1) They're billionaires - they really aren't going to suffer by market fluctuations. Inconvenienced? Oh, sure. Suffer? Bite me. Suffering is trying to figure out if you can afford a one bedroom apartment - or any apartment - on $7.25 an hour, assuming you get full time, with benefits, so you're not having to worry about paying cash for a doctor visit if you get a cold that turns into a lung infection when you can't afford to pay the heating bill, because you're getting paid $7.25 an hour. Billionaires don't worry about which house they will sleep in tonight, since they own more than one house, and - these are Billionaires - they probably own a private jet to take them to said houses;

2) "Benefited from the market's rally in September" - meaning that in October, they're "losing" everything they "gained" in September. Let's remember the stock market is a fantasy land of numbers being pushed around, and does not in any way - ignore what the cokeheads say - reflect the real world in which the rest of us live. Note that I said reflect - the fantasy land of Wall Street definitely shits on us little people, so we suffer when they freak out thinking they "lost" $2bn when the reality is they never "owned" it in the first place - it's all money sex people. Making money by rubbing money together isn't really "producing" anything, it's just numbers. Numbers go up, numbers go down; you can't "lose" anything that didn't exist in the first place;

3) "Exposed" - exposed to what? The rain? Risk of losing a house? Losing their job if their car breaks down? They're fucking billionaires - if they risk losing "everything" because a set of investments moves numbers up and down, then they're morons for having exposed themselves so badly in the first place. If a Billionaire can't have a few hundred million as reserves against "market fluctuations" then the moron needs to give me the money, because I'll be sure I don't lose anything important when the money pimps are off having money sex.