Showing posts with label performance art. Show all posts
Showing posts with label performance art. Show all posts

Friday, August 2, 2019

L L A G L

So, one day I write "ttyl" to this guy I've known for a while now, and he replies "llagl".  So I'm googling it, and apparently it's Welsh for "slack."

So, I ask him "LLAGL?"

He says "Live Long And 'Prosper' *cough* *cough* "

Uh-huh.

So, I think, he's got a weird sense of humor, and...  ah. I think I got it, but I ask him, to be sure.  Yep, I got it.

So, if you see "LLAGL," it could mean


Live Long And Get Laid

So, now you know, and now it's on a blog post, and maybe - just maybe - the crawlers will pick it up, and if you see "llagl" somewhere, you'll get the joke, too.



Friday, December 28, 2018

Comic books aren't real, of course

You know what's missing from the "reality" of comic books and movies?

Tit punches. 

You just know Deadpool would so be there, and Joker (sadist) and Kingpin (ruthless) and fucking Ozymandias (if no one was looking).

I mean, seriously, targets that big and asshat prigs not going to take that shot every third panel? 

Tuesday, December 11, 2018

Butthurt over "White Christmas"

I haven't heard this one yet, but in 2018 where actual Nazis are nakedly walking the streets of America, one ran for political office on a major party ticket (and saod party leadership, proven assholes who don't give a fuck about ethics shrugged and as I "Oh, gee, see we can't stop him," but neither did they try to stop him using their private corporate brand or did they denounce him), and the President calling open white supremacists "very fine people."

The song "Dreaming of a White Christmas" is unambiguously about SNOW.

But, you know somewhere, a room full of white-skinned special snowflakes is dreaming of a world filled by only other special white snowflakes.




Butthurt over "Cold Outside"

"It's Cold Outside"

You either like the song, or you don't. Put your personal butthurt aside for a minute and pay attention.

The song has been around for about a hundred years.

The most famous version is from 1959. This is the version we hear most on the radio.

In 1959, the average American had a bigger vocabulary than today. How's that for sad?

Also, in 1959, there is a serious chance that "gentlemen" were indoctrinated with a better set of behaviors than they are today, including "if she really means 'no,' then be a gentleman and back off."

This is 2018, where the reality if that if she really means "No," there is a very real chance he's going to turm aggro and rape her.

The song, as performed, is clearly intended to be fun and flirty. She's an adult trying to play the coy "But, I'm a good girl, and good girls don't just stay over at a guy's house," game, but she clearly wants an excuse to stay over.

The revolution of the last 30 years has turned that bit over, and women are now allowed to say "if I want to stay, I'll stay, and Hell with decorum."

Some men whine that this "strong women" thing has confused them, and now they're all threatened, but that's a tangent.

If you actually listen to the lyrics, then the entire fucking song he is literally saying "I don't care what you want, I wamt you to stay, and I'm going to get my way."

Yes, literally. And that's the part that - in the era of Bill Cosby and Brock Turner - is chaffing people's butts.

The song lyrics haven't changed. The song lyrics have always had this dual aspect of "fun and flirty" and/or "date rape," but 2018 has been a really aggro year, and the year of #MeToo where women and men are coming forward in droves to say "enough!"

So, if you're feeling butthurt that people are butthurt about the song, pull you're head out of your ass.

The song hasn't changed, but the world is a bit more woke, and in a year or two, we'll all be back to just accepting it as part of Christmas.





Monday, December 10, 2018

Musical Monday - Sam Perry on The Voice Australia

Well, holy shit.  Check out Sam Perry (looping artist).

Artistically, my favorite part is that he tweaks each musical piece and makes it his own.  The technical skill is amazing, and his vocal range is extraordinary.

Each song is clearly recognizable as the original, yet some of them are tweaked to Paradise and back.




Someone was also willing to invest a LOT of money in set pieces for him.  I mean, individually, he puts on a great show, but the set pieces really boost him from a one-man sound symphony to a one-man show-stealing headliner.

He does a great job sharing the stage with others, too.  This makes sense, given he toured with other artists for a couple years, before stomping The Voice Australia.



Thursday, November 29, 2018

Monday, August 27, 2018

Musical Monday - We Will Rock You

I've mentioned before how I enjoy a music video with epic overtones, and this one has "epic cheese factor" all over the place. I mean, it's a frickin' soft drink commercial, but it runs three (3) full minutes, stars three of the biggest female rock icons, and is back-dropped against a Roman amphitheater with shout outs to "Gladiator" and pretty much every Roman-Empire film ever made.




It's good clean cheese factor.  I mean, the song itself is epic cheese!

In the same category of epic cheese, or maybe epic karma, if I recall correctly, Adam Lambert once said he wanted to be like Freddie Mercury - epic singer if ever there was one.

Funny thing, how "Madam Lambert" would one day be Freddie Mercury :-)





Here is how Brian May tells the story:

The thing snowballed very quickly, and we started a long and very fruitful association with Adam in which he has become one of us, part of our family. He’s never attempted to be Freddie, and I think that’s what endears him to the fans, apart from the fact that he is an extraordinary singer with an extraordinary presence.

Roger and I have seen literally thousands of singers in our lifetimes including some great ones auditioning for our We Will Rock You show (which, did I mention, ran for 12 solid years in The Dominion Theatre on the Tottenham Court Road in London?) but we’ve never seen or heard anything like Adam. I always think that Freddie, with a wicked smile, would say something like “I hate you, Madam Lambert,” because even Freddie would have been gobsmacked at his range and his ability to reinterpret these songs which the four of us originally created together.


There can be no doubt that Lambert has not attempted to replace Freddie Mercury. Lambert is his own man, a parallel to Mercury.  Massively big shoes to fill, but Lambert - like Mercury - is an epic showman, who knows how to bring a crowd into the music, and make sure the audience has FUN.

So, there you go: History, Destiny, Epic Cheese.  Happy Monday! :-)


Sunday, April 1, 2018

Happy Easter!

So, here is a picture of me at Indiana Comic Con this weekend. The Con just wrapped up, sorry I missed you there.

Figured I'd get in one last cosplay before the baby bump really starts to show. I was also trying to pitch my idea for a new "mild-manned coffee barista gets wrapped in alien skin suit and gains superpowers kind of like 'guyver bio booster' only sexier."

Like the guyver, the "chest plates" open up, revealing powerful "reflex cannons," which blow shit up, and cause a lot of collateral damage. As you might imagine, use of the cannons is extremely exhausting, so she does it rarely.

The "ears" on top are extrasensory antenna, giving her different cool abilities, but mostly enhanced hearing and "danger sense."

The hair is mine. I had the dumb idea to lighten it.  It was a dumb idea, because I know better - as I discovered that time I tried "to go green," even "gentle" chemicals rip up my scalp. If you look closely, you might see bits of the white scalp healing lotion the doctor gave me the last time I was this stupid. (Clortrimizole, or something. I can't find it right now.)

Pitching my idea, I got lots of, ahem, "interest," but I don't think anyone will actually offer any money.

Ah, well. At least I had fun.



Friday, March 23, 2018

A Tattoo of the Planet Saturn. And Exoplanets!

I could totally go for a tattoo of Saturn. I love astronomy. The universe is so fucking awesome.

(model unknown, but don't you just wonder if 
she knew this pic was going to be smeared all over the interwebs?)


Did you know: "As of 8 March 2018, there are 3,743 confirmed planets in 2,796 systems, with 625 systems having more than one planet."
source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Exoplanet

I mean, holy crap, we have so got to get the FTL drive running, so I can see some of them before I die!

Oh, speaking of FTL, I ran across this by total chance ...




Monday, January 15, 2018

Musical Monday - Shatter Me - Lindsey Stirling ft Lzzy Hale

So, I finally broke down and bought the Lindsey Stirling album "Shatter Me," because it turns out it has the title song (vid below) and two others that I really like - "Roundtable Rival" and "Master of Tides."  I'll let you know if I fall in love with any of the other songs on the album.

Plus, as I've mentioned before (and before that), the whole "classical strings plus hard rock" is totally my thing.




Oh, and as I've mentioned before, I've got that whole grrl crush thing on Lzzy Hale.  Go figure, since - wait for it - as I've mentioned before, I'm not actually into women :-)

Right. So, there you go. Musical Monday.  Because, music is a fucking beautiful art form.




Monday, December 11, 2017

Musical Monday - Lita Ford & Lzzy Hale "Close My Eyes Forever"

Because, you know I've got a grrl crush on Lzzy Hale. She's got an amazing voice.  And Hell, this song is a mega classic. I mean, Lita Ford still has a powerful voice that has lasted all these years since the did the original with Ozzy.




It's cool to see performers in front of a live audience.  They've got a different vibe in concert than they do in scripted vids.




Friday, November 3, 2017

Fiction Friday - A Singing Paladin

Mariëlle Sylvia Altink - A Singing Paladin


Background & Origin: She was a minstrel, with a natural talent for remembering songs and music, before her conversion of faith.

She was working as a minstrel at a popular carnival town. A high-level adventuring party came through. They had just lost a companion, and were drowning their sorrows in drink. An angel appeared at the table, and called the company by name - “the company that numbers eight shall go forth and do this quest!”  By random dumb luck, she was sitting and chatting with them, and suddenly found herself part of the legendary group, and magically enthralled into a quest!

The adventuring group knew they were stuck with her, and she was stuck with them, so they made the best of it and trained her up right away into her new career. She has a lot of energy and was a fast study.

Combat Tactics:  The crossbow is for sniping when there is time to prepare.  Otherwise, she carries javelins for either a quick thrust, or a quick throw.  Once the target is close enough, she hits people with her greataxe.

Her core powers make her a bit of a rallying point for her allies. She stays to the front, with the mainline damage dealers, as frontline tank and healer.

She treats her primary role as frontline support, and her favorite combat spell is bless, since her and her allies get a huge boost for relatively minor resource consumption (allies within 10 feet of her, and under a bless effect, gain +4+1d4 bonus on every saving throw).

Personality Traits: At heart, she is a philosopher and entertainer, but she got caught up in something bigger than herself, and has embraced it.  If nothing else, it let’s her collect new songs and music she would never have encountered before.

Appearance: 5’ 5” and a muscular build. Her hair is auburn-red.

Powers:  She is a half-elf paladin with a natural talent for learning and remembering songs and music.  

Powers: Extensive martial training and spell casting.

Notes:  Model unknown.  Character by I.A. Riley November, 2016.


scandanavian woman.jpg
(model unknown)

Mariëlle Sylvia Altink - D&D 5e


Neutral Good Half-Elf Paladin 7

Strength     16 (+3)
Dexterity     10
Constitution     14 (+2)
Intelligence     8 (-1)
Wisdom     12 (+1)
Charisma     18 (+4)

Hit Points    60
Armor Class     18
Speed         30 ft

Proficiency Bonus: +3
Saving Throw Totals:  Strength (+7), Dexterity (+4), Constitution (+5), Intelligence (+3), Wisdom (+8), Charisma (+11) (italics means proficient save)(modifiers already include her Aura of Protection) 

Racial Features: Immune to magical sleep effects; Darkvision 60 ft; advantage on saving throws against being charmed; bonus skills

Background:  Entertainer
Background Features: By Popular Demand (she can always play for room and board)

Combat Proficiencies:  Simple Weapons; Martial Weapons; All Armor; Shields;
Skill Proficiencies: Acrobatics (+3), History (+2), Insight (+4), Medicine (+4),  Performance (+7), Religion (+2)
Tool Proficiencies: Disguise Kit, Musical Instrument (lyre)

Languages: Common, Elvish, Halfling

Class Features:  
  • Aura of Devotion (her and friendly creatures within 10 feet of her can't be charmed while she is conscious);
  • Aura of Protection (when conscious, she and any friendly creatures within 10 feet gain +4 to all saving throws)
  • Channel Divinity (1 use, short or long rest to recover);
    • Sacred Weapon (for one minute, held weapon is treated as magical, gains +4 attack bonus, sheds light to 20/40-foot radius);
    • Turn the Unholy (any fiend or undead must DC 15 Wisdom save or flee from her presence for one minute);
  • Divine Health (immune to disease);
  • Divine Sense (sense celestials, fiends and undead, 60 ft radius, 5 uses, recharge with long rest);
  • Divine Smite (expend paladin spell slots to add radiant damage to melee attacks, chosen after hitting the creature; 1st level slot adds +2d8, 2nd level slot adds +3d8, add +1d8 more if target is undead or a fiend);
  • Extra Attack (she gets two attacks with the Attack action);
  • Spellcasting (DC 15; Spell slots 4/3; typical spells prepared 1st- bless, cure wounds, divine favor, protection from evil and good, sanctuary, shield of faith, 2nd- aid, lesser restoration, magic weapon; spell slots recharge with long rest);
  • Lay on Hands (35 hit points; can be used to treat other conditions; recharge with long rest);
  • Sacred Oath (Oath of Devotion) (Honesty, Courage, Compassion, Honor, Duty).

Equipment: Splint mail armor (AC 17); greataxe (attack +6, 1d12+3 damage, reroll a 1 or 2); five (5) javelins (attack +6, 1d6+3 damage, range 30/120); heavy crossbow (attack +3, damage 1d10, range 100/400); twenty (20) quarrels; Musical instrument (6-string lyre); the favor of an admirer (a love letter); a costume; an explorer's pack; 250 gp

b462cb417dd57fa9339a1895a4972036.jpg
Source - https://www.pinterest.com/sk37chyz/axe-wielders/  - Mariette Jacobs - www.artstation.com

Document Copyright (C) 2016 by I.A. Riley. All rights reserved.  Portions Copyright others; no attempt is made to infringe upon their rights.

Random backstory generator - http://www.pbegames.com/lifepath/ .

Random name generator - http://www.behindthename.com/random/ .



Monday, October 30, 2017

Musical Monday - Toto - Africa (metal cover)

Toto - Africa (metal cover by Leo Moracchioli feat. Rabea & Hannah)

Leo Morcchioli does some fun vids, and has some fun interpretations.  The reinterpretation of "Africa" is fun.  The second half of the video is fun, too.





I really like Hannah's voice. She has her own channel, and is fun to watch.

Rabea makes the best faces, and is obviously a brilliant guitarist.



Monday, October 23, 2017

Musical Monday - Russian Rammstein - Du Riechst So Gut

This video makes me happy.  I love classical instrumental rock songs.  (For example, The Harp Twins.)

I'm torn which amuse me more - the audience reactions, or the performers themselves. It's always funny to see how people react to a heavy metal song (in this case, Rammstein) played on classical instruments.



I think the video shows a splice of multiple performances, possibly some of them with an audience.  I think the audience segments are probably also spliced from different performances.

Whatever. This video makes me happy.   :-)



Monday, October 16, 2017

Musical Monday - The Mean(er) Kitty Video

I like cats.  I have mixed feelings on rap and hip-hop.  Lots of great music in those genres, but some of it sucks.

Anyway, this is a fun silly video. The guy who made it was obviously just goofing around.

The cat is adorable.









Friday, October 13, 2017

Darth Vader, Asshole, Part 2

As I said last week, I've always considered Darth Vader to be kind of an asshole and special snowflake bully.  But, you know, Vader does has style oozing out his helmeted ears, so no surprise some people come up with some really amazing cosplay.

Now that's style.  
I could totally game this character.
(model unknown)


You know, whatever else I think, I give her props for working hard to develop that costume.  I'm also betting (and hoping), she and her boyfriend had major monkey sex that night.  She totally earned it.
(model unknown)


Model Sithvixen
As Sithvixen points out, "Guys love boob armor."


Okay, so you're little girl is adapting an iconic major badass into a costume. I can dig that. Girls need badass role models. I still prefer Wonder Woman to Vader, but the kid rocks it, and I applaud her.
(model unknown)


Blow it. I love body paint. This is cool.
(Model unknown)




Friday, October 6, 2017

Darth Vader, Asshole

Personally, I always thought Darth Vader was kind of an asshole. Sure, he has some major badass style, but I mean, "You've disappointed me for the last time!" (Choke, choke, choke) - what kind of weaksauce idiot manager does that? That's so not going to retain quality talent. Duh.


And, seriously, how much of a special snowflake do you really have to be to bully people who disagree with you?  "I find your lack of faith disturbing," so "I'll choke you and frighten everyone in the room into seeing how big and badass scary I am, because I'm such a snowflake I need people to be afraid of me, all the time!"

Yeah, that's on par with "I took my assault rifle to Wal-Mart to buy cookies, because I'm such a special bullying chicken, I need everyone to see I'm a hardass about my cookies."

Or, maybe, as special snowflake as "I'll sue you for being mean to me! (And then I'll stiff the lawyers on the bill, I'm so hardass!)"

So, yeah. I always thought Vader was kind of an asshole.



Wednesday, October 4, 2017

Neck Tattoos - not such a good idea

Tell me what you think, but I've always found face and neck tattoos very distracting. As a rule, it seems to me, they are so prominent that when someone looks at you, they see mostly tattoo. The idea like your face becomes an accessory to the artwork, rather than the other way around. That's my thought, anyway.

As others have pointed out, neck/throat tattoos can be especially problematic to your future employment options. Tattoos are pretty common these days, and we have a local Target store where I tease the employees that tattoos must be a job requirement :) Some have prominent tattoos, others only the one or two, but almost all of them seem to have some.

One of the Target cashiers, a woman about 20, was telling me how she was going to cover her tattoos when she went to med school. It wasn't about her art, it is just that med school people are still pretty reserved and "old fashion" about tattoos, and she knew some students and faculty would get distracted just because she had ink.

Also, large pieces of evocative artwork - such as a skull or Jesus, for example - might make a prospective employer - even one tattoo-friendly - think twice about how customers might react to it, and might pass you over for someone less decorated.

I don't know. What do you think?


(model unknown)

Friday, August 18, 2017

Fiction Friday: Horror, Kink, or Both?

Long time readers know that humans fascinate me.  From the amazing highs and despicable lows, to the quirky and the just plain weird (and weirder).  So, no surprise this image pops up here, right?

(I have no idea where this came from, 
but memo to self: never, ever, ever - no really, not ever Google "American Horror Story" again!)

I could actually see that being a real woman, and a real scene from some kind of movie. Either real horror, or real kink. I mean, lots of people have disfiguring injuries these days, and so many filmmakers need content, there are lots of opportunities for unusual body types.

Well, that and lots of people are into weird shit. I mean, there is an actual fetish/mental disorder associated with sexual attraction to having body parts removed. So, Hell, that could be a real woman acting in a niche Internet film.

Hell, the background even reminds me of "SAW" (I've seen still photos, because, you know, I'm insane enough to have Googled "SAW").

Anyway, since this is a #FictionFriday post, what derangement do you see?