That relationship has got to end

Listen, random lady overheard on the train: Any time you use the phrase "Well, he doesn't hit her..." you've just described a relationship that doesn't have "communication issues," (as you went on to say), you've described a toxic relationship that simply needs to be ended.  Ugh.

Is Common Sense dead, or what? Double Ugh.

A clean house, my ass

It's not fair.

If the monster-in-law comes over, and the house is a mess, it's my fault for not keeping it clean.

If my mother comes over, and the house is a mess, it's my fault for marrying a slob.

Dad and Other Dad don't give a crap, as long as they have somewhere to sit down.

Cleaning the damn house isn't even on my chore list, because apparently I clean as well as I cook.  Except the bathroom. I'm kind of a freak about the bathroom.

All I'm saying is that it just isn't fair.

Every Sperm is Sacred - Masturbation is Murder

Science has determined that every sperm represents half the genetic make-up of a human being. That means that each and every sperm is a potential human being.

Therefore, the destruction of sperm is the destruction of human life.

God, in His Infinite Wisdom, has designed the male body to expel thousands of sperm with every ejaculation. Since we lack a method to save all these lost potential souls, we can only do as God has ordained, and limit the loss of life.

Therefore, in order to honor and protect life, henceforth the following actions are illegal for any man to do:

• Masturbate (alone or with a partner);

• Anal sex;

• Oral sex;

• Premature Ejaculation;

• "Nocturnal Emission" (whether at night, while sleeping, or not).

The evidence on presence of sperm in "pre-cum" for stimulated males is pending.

Only the following methods of sperm release shall be permitted to men:

• Vaginal orgasm with a consenting, adult, female, to whom you are lawfully wed.

Only the following method of "birth control" is acceptable, since all others require the murder of human life, either the slaughter of sperm, or the death of a fetus:

• "The Pill";

(Note that use of "the pill" might be morally objectionable under the "promotes being a slut" provisions, even when used by a lawfully married woman, prepared to provide documentation she is having sex only with her husband, and prepared to sign a pledge saying she will not become a slut, harlot, or loose woman.)

(Note also that we have given this a lot of thought. If you fancy you can think of a method of "birth control" that we haven't, then you're wrong and should seek medical attention - from a licensed doctor, or aggressive religious leader, whichever - for your deviancy.)

• First time sperm murdering men will be sent to self-control education classes;

• Second time sperm murdering men will be put on medications to control their unnatural, psychotic, murdering urges;

• Third time offenders will be shot by a robot-controlled gun, on a random timer, because every life is sacred, and guns don't kill people, people kill people, and the random timer means that God ordains the moment of death for the sick, murderous sinner.

Musical Monday - Halestorm - Mz Hyde

It wasn't like he didn't know before he committed for life.  He's embraced the variety of the madness, which is a good thing. Yep. I'm a lucky lady.

I love Lzzy Hale's voice. Just something about the harmonics is great.  Plus, she has such incredible passion - you can hear it in her voice, and see it in every video. She loves the music, and she loves performing.  I bet she and the band are living a surreal (if working their butts off) life. I hope they have even more success, and continue to have fun.

Theological Thursday: Jesus Loves Fags

Two important messages here:

 

1. Just as you can lead a horse to water, but you cannot force it to drink. So, too, you can try to teach the ignorant, but you cannot force them to learn. It has to be a two-way effort;
2. Jesus loves everybody. Everyone says so, there are even songs about it.

Right-O. So, we've established that Jesus Loves Everybody, right? That includes homosexuals.  And black people. And Muslims. Yeah, see, Jesus was Jewish, but he said "everyone is a child of God, and God loves all His children," right?  Yeah, see that includes Muslims, even  those black Muslims, and you just know those are the worst kind, right?  I mean "dark" and "Muslim."  I shudder to imagine it.

Jesus Loves Everybody. Even the fuckwits who insist on being ignorant, petty, selfish, bigots.

Yep, Jesus even loves them.

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Bigot Baker Goes Broke, Oh Boo-Hoo

So, let's be clear:

1) If you want to run a business, and have a license to serve food, you are not allowed to discriminate against human beings. There are provisions for safety and sanitation, e.g. if the person is carrying a knife, or "No shoes, no shirt, no service," but black, gay, short, whatever, not allowed to discriminate;

2) Melissa and her husband CHOSE to refuse service, in violation of the law, and CHOSE to shut down the business office;

3) Apparently, despite running a business in violation of the law, they are trying to dodge the law by baking out of her home kitchen. Okay, this is dodgy because there are sanitation and food preparation laws to protect people. The laws are not meant to screw "mom & pop" shops like these two bigots, the laws are meant to prevent McDonalds-Mega-Corp from selling you even lower quality, e.g. barely-fit-for-animal-consumption, food than they already do.

So, basically, I have no sympathy for these bigots, and I resent their efforts to play for pity and sympathy. In fact, I have no tolerance for bigots of any strip.

And no, this does not "make me a bigot," as the strawman argument goes. Failing to tolerate intolerance makes me a moral, ethical person, who understood the words of Jesus: "We are all children of God," and "What you do to the least among you, you do to me." I.e. "When your petty bigotry leads you - literally or metaphorically - to spit on someone, it means you spit on me."

March 2016 update:  Found a new meme recently, and thought it just fit this so bloody well.

Marriage defined in the real world

"Defenders" of "traditional marriage values" like to cite religious scripture to say that marriage is a "union of one man, and one woman."

Funny thing is, in the real world, marriage is just contract law. No, really, end of discussion.

How do I know?

Well, in the real world one man and one woman can form a union, and raise children, and do everything together without ever filing legal contract law paperwork.

In the real world, one man - or one woman -can sign marriage contracts with multiple partners, as long as they only do it sequentially and not concurrently, since the contracts are exclusionary.

In the real world, said contract law provides binding legal rights and privileges to the partners, which are independent of any union the two might have. The contracted couple could even live wholly separate lives and never contact each other, and still have binding legal privilege over each other.

in the real world, people look at said same holy scripture and ask "How many wives did that Solomon guy have, exactly?"